A Heart More Focused

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Paralyzed by Stress

July 2, 2010 By Erika Zane

2 Jul

I am spoiled.

The last time my husband and I moved we were living in Philly and I was traveling for my job (and I’m also a procrastinator, so I definitely wasn’t using the weekend a WHOLE WEEK before the movers came to pack!) so Andy did most of the packing before the movers came.

Andy learned his lesson.  The movers are here now packing.

I am a SAHM and I have a baby who has finally caught on to the whole napping thing and now takes 2-3 hour naps at a time AND I still can’t manage to pick up a finger to pack.

So here I am feeling very useless and it occurred to me, I have never really had to pack up.  I ALWAYS do this.  As much as I like to think I enjoy change, really, it terrifies me and I react by not eating and sleeping a lot.

I have always considered myself a strong, adaptable person… but I’m not really as strong or adaptable as I think I am.  I think the only reason I don’t have panic attacks is: I just pretend nothing is happening until after it’s happened.

But, you know what?  If that keeps me sane and happy and we can work around my refusal to do anything useful, maybe it’s ok…  Thank you for being so strong and adaptable for me Andy!

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Filed Under: Family, life changes, Moving, SAHM

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Comments

  1. Diana says

    July 2, 2010 at 8:18 pm

    >Hey – I'm a big believer in whatever works. 🙂 I'm also sitting here, working on my blog, instead of packing. I have entire garage full of empty boxes and tape waiting for me. I tend to push things till they just can't wait any longer and then get all panicked over getting it done in time.

    Healthy right? 🙂

  2. sassyshell says

    July 2, 2010 at 10:21 pm

    >It's all about figuring out how we handle/process things! Relax, the moving people are packing everything up, and you just need to sit back and relax until its time for the drive! Enjoy the weekend, see you soon! 🙂

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About me

Hello and welcome.  It’s been a while.  For Lent this year I decided to fast from the thing that took too much of my attention from what is truly important: Social Media.  Though there are countless amazing benefits to Social Media, after about a month offline so far, there are seemingly just as many negatives.  I never realized how much of my brain had been hijacked by it.  I’ve had so many revelations about how much easier it is to move forward when I’m not constantly reminded of the past.  But I still want to record my family as they grow at this ridiculous speed and, I’m realizing, so many of our family’s memories are here.  Those along with so many of the struggles and stages we’ve worked through.  Maybe in the midst of COVID19 isolation and my kids around me so often, I’m brought back to a time when they were too young for school and with me so often.  Writing here during that time helped make up for the limited adult conversation in my days and the overwhelm provided by my… little treasures 😉 My husband, fur babies, three fiesty kids, and I hereby extend an invitation to visit this little sneak peak into our life. We’re super flawed and broken and there aren’t too many dull moments around here.  And I promise it’s not always as magical as some of my golden hour, sun-soaked images would suggest.  There’s usually too much coffee in my system and we welcome all the prayers.  Come on over if you want to process with me.

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