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I Can Do Everything You Can Do… Differently.

October 13, 2011 By Erika Zane

13 Oct

Reflecting on this week, I see a reoccurring theme.

The post I wrote on Monday about rebellion in the form of parenting got very positive reactions.  Most parents and, especially mothers, can relate to a desire to parent in their own way.  To pick the things that are most important to them, as a parent, and focus on those things.  Most people, me included, are proud of those choices and hold tight to them.

The point of my post on Monday was that though I’m proud of those choices and, clearly, thought they were the best choice for our family, I recognize that they are not the only way to do things.  Yet, I also get the feeling that my choices somehow come off as judgements on other parents.

My friend Diana over at Hormonal Imbalances and I have commiserated over this over and over again.  We have had long conversations about how our choices are our choices.  That doesn’t mean we’re judging anyone else’s, just putting our’s out there in an effort to connect.  Yet, we both frequently get heated reactions when we share our priorities, like the reactions to her post on Monday.  (Kim over at Baby Feet – another awesome blog – wrote a nice follow up post to Diana’s and there were more heated reactions.)

I recently found a Holistic Moms group in the area.  The group is meant as a place for moms to connect on the choices they have made that don’t always fit in.  There is no definition to what makes someone a holistic mom because we all have different definitions of what that means.  It is just a safe haven for discussion.  Shouldn’t our blogs be that same thing for all topics?

We all want to do our best.  We all make decisions that work for us and don’t want to be held to other people’s standards.  Why is it so easy to take someone’s words personally when they aren’t intended that way?  How do my priorities, stated on my blog come off as a judgement on others when I only talk about myself?

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Filed Under: Family, motherhood, Parenting, values

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Comments

  1. Kim says

    October 13, 2011 at 12:16 pm

    Thanks for the shout out- so kind of you.
    Kim recently posted..Role Reversal

  2. Diana @Hormonal Imbalances says

    October 14, 2011 at 12:46 am

    Amen. I know we’ve talked on this before but it seems like it’s still there so much – the personal nature of blogging brings out the worst in people at times. I don’t know how to get around this – but I’m trying to just write and not think about it so much. :/
    Diana @Hormonal Imbalances recently posted..From here on out

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About me

Hello and welcome.  It’s been a while.  For Lent this year I decided to fast from the thing that took too much of my attention from what is truly important: Social Media.  Though there are countless amazing benefits to Social Media, after about a month offline so far, there are seemingly just as many negatives.  I never realized how much of my brain had been hijacked by it.  I’ve had so many revelations about how much easier it is to move forward when I’m not constantly reminded of the past.  But I still want to record my family as they grow at this ridiculous speed and, I’m realizing, so many of our family’s memories are here.  Those along with so many of the struggles and stages we’ve worked through.  Maybe in the midst of COVID19 isolation and my kids around me so often, I’m brought back to a time when they were too young for school and with me so often.  Writing here during that time helped make up for the limited adult conversation in my days and the overwhelm provided by my… little treasures 😉 My husband, fur babies, three fiesty kids, and I hereby extend an invitation to visit this little sneak peak into our life. We’re super flawed and broken and there aren’t too many dull moments around here.  And I promise it’s not always as magical as some of my golden hour, sun-soaked images would suggest.  There’s usually too much coffee in my system and we welcome all the prayers.  Come on over if you want to process with me.

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