I don’t feel like writing

November 8, 2012 By Erika Zane

8 Nov

Today, I just don’t feel like it.

Or posting anything for that matter. I could write about a million things, but not one thing I want to open up about.

I wish I knew why I feel so closed today, but I don’t. I just want to sit in silence (or as close to silence as I can get with kids) and think.

This posting every day for BlogHer’s November NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) might be harder than I initially thought. I figured I’d have the occasional writers block, but I never expected to feel so exposed. I never expected to want a day where I didn’t put myself out there at all.

So, I’m sorry, but this is all I have today. A bunch of feelings that I can’t expect you to understand because I don’t really understand them myself.

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Comments

Hannah says

November 9, 2012 at 3:16 pm

I just really like you! And I feel this way so often, but you said it so beautifully. Sometimes I think we need to listen to ourselves and just…refrain.
- Erika @aHeartMoreFocused says
  
  November 11, 2012 at 8:49 pm
  
  Thanks Hannah! You made me smile. I agree about the need to refrain sometimes. Unfortunately, I learned to take more care with what I do and don’t say on here the hard way. Live (and read The Word) and learn 😉

Hello and welcome. It’s been a while. For Lent this year I decided to fast from the thing that took too much of my attention from what is truly important: Social Media. Though there are countless amazing benefits to Social Media, after about a month offline so far, there are seemingly just as many negatives. I never realized how much of my brain had been hijacked by it. I’ve had so many revelations about how much easier it is to move forward when I’m not constantly reminded of the past. But I still want to record my family as they grow at this ridiculous speed and, I’m realizing, so many of our family’s memories are here. Those along with so many of the struggles and stages we’ve worked through. Maybe in the midst of COVID19 isolation and my kids around me so often, I’m brought back to a time when they were too young for school and with me so often. Writing here during that time helped make up for the limited adult conversation in my days and the overwhelm provided by my… little treasures 😉 My husband, fur babies, three fiesty kids, and I hereby extend an invitation to visit this little sneak peak into our life. We’re super flawed and broken and there aren’t too many dull moments around here. And I promise it’s not always as magical as some of my golden hour, sun-soaked images would suggest. There’s usually too much coffee in my system and we welcome all the prayers. Come on over if you want to process with me.